What needs, if the unfulfilled result in psychological disorders in adults?

The saying” live in the moment”, emphasising the need to enjoy the present as the key to happiness and peace has become quite a popular mantra in recent times. Living behind in your past or too anxious about the future are considered to be counterproductive traits. But when it comes to one’s mental health, sometimes it becomes essential to go back to one’s past, trace the root cause of psychological issues and resolve certain aspects to let one enjoy the present and  for this, you can connect to psychotherapy in Toronto.

 

Our experiences as children and adolescents shape us as a person in the course of life. These experiences differ, it can be ill home ambiance, becoming the prey of sexual abuse to a family relative or feeling neglected by family members, etc. Traumatic events from which children can’t recover like the sudden death of someone very close or parents getting separated or being abandoned by parents etc. also have serious impacts on their psychological health. These childhood experiences influence their relationships with friends and people in the future.

 

4 needs which result in psychological issues in adults

 

Below mentioned is the list of needs which, if not fulfilled or met during adolescence, leave ineradicable marks on the life of a person, causing distress, depression or other forms of psychological disorders. As a result, concerned individuals have to deal with the entire situation alone, taking care of themselves and getting through tough times on their own.

 

Emotional attachment 

 

We all crave attention, care, and comfort. Growing up in an environment where one continuously is deprived of care, love, attachments, the individual seems to distance himself from friends and family. If a person has grown up without guardians, they might seek for that love, care, and comfort in their partners. When they find one such person, they try to anchor to them desperately for emotional support and fear to lose them.

 

At times, such people become insecure and clingy. Some, on the other hand, might find it difficult to get attached to others. They develop the habit of pushing people away or keeping themselves alienated. People who experience abandonment issues or have been emotionally vulnerable all through their childhood, develop a lack of self-confidence, anorexia, bulimia or depression, anxiety disorder or mood disorders. Some even suffer from a borderline personality disorder. People who went through a troubled childhood faces these difficulties, especially in building romantic relationships with people.

 

The Need for Mirroring:

 

Some people need constant assurance. They are so low on self-confidence, feel empty and out of touch with themselves, that they need people to give them attention and respond to every call of theirs. This occurs due to the absence of mirroring during childhood. Mirroring means that people respond to our calls, assuring us that what we are worthy of.

 

When others see us be competent, able, worthwhile and good we start believing in ourselves. Once they start getting assurance from their friends and family, their self-confidence receives a boost and they start to live from within and gradually stop seeking validation from others. Parents should take interest in knowing what their children are doing and what are they interested in, instead of putting their recommendations and expectations on their children. When parents fail to reciprocate in the same manner, their children develop a sense of alienation and grow to be unsure about themselves.

 

The need for mentoring

 

Certain individuals feel directionless, demotivated or adrift because there was no one to idolise or guide them as mentors when they were young. Some people grow without parents around them, feeling their absence every moment. As a result, they grow jealous of their friends who have the privilege to grow with their parents. We all need this unnamed relationship with someone who would take us under their guidance, shaping every aspect of our life with their greater wisdom. This makes us feel protected and safe, at the same time aspiring us to grow like them in our future. Because of this guidance and motivation, we start living our dreams and fantasies with utmost determination and confidence.

 

Validation

 

Another strong desire that must be fulfilled during childhood is the sense that others think, look or feel in the same way as they do. This makes us feel that we aren’t strange, Weird or odd. This sense makes us feel like we too are a part of society. This is referred to as the need of twinship. Many people struggle trying to be like their friends in school and colleges because they have been bullied earlier for being weird or different. This lack of twinship negatively impacts the child and the child mitigates this by entering alternative circles. Some take to drugs whereas some completely isolate themselves, carrying with them the trauma of being bullied.

 

By understanding what a person has gone through in his past will help any psychotherapist analyse the root cause of this psychological disorder. If you too are going through any such mental issues, undergo psychotherapy in Toronto.

Psychotherapy in Toronto involves a wide range of treatments that will meet your emotional and mental needs. Addressing your past wounds would help you put an end to the mental issues you are facing now.

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